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Dating a man with intimacy issues
Any man who has dealt with abuse as a child may find it nearly impossible to open up and develop connections with other people in general. Physical, mental, and sexual, they can all lead to intimacy issues later in life.
Childhood abuse may also affect other parts of a man’s life, of course.
In order to meet the criteria for intimacy anxiety disorder, either high anxiety in partner-social interactions and/or high anxiety in sexual interactions are present.
The results of this study showed that "Confidence in others' dependability and comfort with closeness were negatively correlated with the FIS whereas fear of abandonment was not correlated with the FIS.
…The attachment dimensions and the FIS were significantly correlated in the predicted direction with trait anxiety".
Fear of intimacy has three defining features: content which represents the ability to communicate personal information, emotional valence which refers to the feelings about personal information exchanged, and vulnerability signifying their regard for the person they are intimate with.
Bartholomew and Horowitz go further and determine four different adult attachment types: "(1) Secure individuals have a sense of worthiness or lovability and are comfortable with intimacy and autonomy; (2) preoccupied persons lack this sense of self-worthiness yet view others positively and seek their love and acceptance; (3) fearful people lack a sense of lovability and are avoidant of others in anticipation of rejection; (4) dismissing persons feel worthy of love yet detach from others whom they generally regard as untrustworthy".
Fear of intimacy is generally a social phobia and anxiety disorder resulting in difficulty forming close relationships with another person.
The term can also refer to a scale on a psychometric test, or a type of adult in attachment theory psychology.
The Fear of Intimacy Scale (FIS) is a 35-item self-evaluation that can determine the level of fear of intimacy that an individual has.
This test can determine this level even if the individual is not in a relationship.
The fear of intimacy is the fear of being emotionally and/or physically close to another individual.
This fear is also defined as "the inhibited capacity of an individual, because of anxiety, to exchange thought and feelings of personal significance with another individual who is highly valued".